Breaking
by The Half Mad Muggle
Summary: Severus Snape is Voldemort's prisoner. Albus Dumbledore searches for his lost friend but will he arrive in time, or will Voldemort totally break his lost servant? Sequel to "To Break." NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

**Breaking**

**Sequel to "To Break". Second in the "Breaking" Trilogy.**

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**Chapter One:**

It was cold; very cold. He pulled his arms tighter around himself, shivering. He raised his head to watch the figure circling him, like a vulture cornering its prey. He felt empty; he had been so sure that he would have been killed, that he had prepared himself for that moment. Now he felt drained; he was existing, but not living.

Perhaps this was a good thing, considering his predicament.

Severus Snape had been a prisoner for much of his life; this much had become clear to him as time had progressed. But that had been a spiritual imprisonment and a mental imprisonment.

Now his spirit, his mind and his body was trapped in this cell.

Lord Voldemort was pondering him. The red eyes that had blazed with emotion little more than an hour ago were now dead. This worried Snape more; he craved freedom and yet it evaded him.

The silence was hurting him; he could barely hear himself breathing. He could feel the pounding of his heart, but no sound reached his ears. He felt remote, as if watching the scene before him through someone else's eyes.

"Do you have anything to say for yourself, Severus?" Voldemort breathed, not needing to speak above a whisper; he knew he had Snape's undivided attention.

Snape stared at him for a moment longer before answering, "No, my Lord. I will give you no excuses; nor will I feed you any more lies."

"You feel the weight of your betrayal. It saddens me that you turned from me. I wish to know a reason."

"You killed the person I loved more than anyone else, my Lord, even though I asked you not to." Snape paused. "I begged you not to."

"She was nothing to you, Severus. She would have only hindered you." Voldemort moved closer, "Is that your reason? It is not because Dumbledore twisted you with his lies?"

Snape felt a stirring of something in his chest at the mention of Dumbledore's name. "He showed me another...perspective."

"The right perspective?" Voldemort challenged, anger sharpening his voice like the blade of a knife.

"A perspective that did not involve killing people to show your power." Snape replied; he had no reason to be dishonest anymore; Dumbledore had shown him a new way of living, and he was happy to acknowledge that.

"Wrong answer, Severus."

He had been expecting the Cruciatus for nearly sixty four minutes. When it came, it was almost a relief. He was able to feel—feel the needles pushing into his skin, feel the cold floor as his palms smashed against it, trying to hold himself upright.

Voldemort didn't let off, simply watching as Snape fought against his own pride and dignity.

Through the pain filled haze clouding his vision, Snape thought about the man he was here for. He had argued with Dumbledore for this precise reason—how he lied and suffered and cried for him.

But he knew the reason why he did these things. It had taken him a long time to realise, yes. But now it was becoming clear to him.

He loved Dumbledore like a father; he would do anything for the man. So that was why he gritted his teeth and refused to scream. That was why he stiffened his muscles and did not give in.

That was why he plastered one thought into his mind, so that even if Voldemort did use his tormented state to violate his mind he would see only one thing.

_Albus Dumbledore is the greatest wizard who ever lived._

* * *

It was cold; very cold. He pulled his arms tighter around himself, shivering. He raised his head to watch the raindrops running down the window. He felt empty.

Perhaps this was a good thing.

Albus Dumbledore didn't want to contemplate the terrible feelings in his chest at that moment. Loss and anxiety and heartache. He wanted to tear the world apart and yet he did not have the strength.

But he knew the reason why he felt these thing. It had taken him a long time to realise, yes. But now it was becoming clear to him.

He loved Severus like a son; he would do anything for the man.

So that was why he stood calmly and summoned the Order of the Phoenix. That was why he gritted his teeth and stiffened his muscles to keep the pain in.

That was why he plastered only one thought into his mind, so that everyone would understand that he would only do one thing.

_I will rescue you, Severus Snape. Mark my words._


	2. Chapter 2

**Breaking**

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* * *

Chapter Two:**

There was a tingling in his fingers and toes. That was pleasant, he mused. If he concentrated hard enough, he could feel the sweat running down his spine.

Or was that blood? He wasn't entirely sure.

He knew he was bleeding but he couldn't see the red. He could hardly move his head; when he did, he descended into dizziness and nausea—so he didn't bother. He lay still, body trembling...but he couldn't control that, so he just listened.

Listening.

What could he hear? He could hear his own breathing. In and out, a stuttered rhythm that had long since stopped flowing. His heart pounding—a drum hammering an internal fight that threatened to destroy him.

And footsteps. The constant trail of footsteps, walking back and forth, up and down, round and round.

Circling him like a vulture. Always circling. Sometimes pausing to observe him; sometimes pausing to taunt him; always pausing to hurt him.

The curse fell again and he felt his body convulse like an inanimate puppet on the strings of a cruel master. He wouldn't even try to hold himself still; he concentrated more on his mouth. He would not scream—he would never scream. Not for this man—not now. There was only one man he would scream for.

That man was not Lord Voldemort. He would not scream.

"I tire of this, Severus." Lord Voldemort announced, stopping near to Snape's left side. Snape hardly reacted to the words that resonated throughout his pounding, aching head.

"I said; I tire of this." Voldemort was not used to being ignored—this much was clear.

But Snape would still defy him. He would still defy until the day he died. That was his promise.

His new promise.

The footsteps were closer now. He felt a brush of air as Voldemort knelt next to Snape. Cold claws touched his wet fingers. "Look at your hand, Severus." The fingernail traced the lines in his palm—still Snape defied him, still he did not look at him.

"The weapon of a Potion Master." Voldemort mused, bending the fingers back to measure them against his own. "So elegant."

Something else touched the bone of his palm. Something thin. Something warm.

Something wooden. Voldemort uttered an incantation beneath his tongue—and the bone cracked.

Snape bit his lip hard enough to draw blood—he refused to let the sound emerge. But he had had finally opened his eyes—they flew straight to Voldemort's cruel and mocking gaze, watching the Dark wizard raise a pale eyebrow. "Still no sound, Severus?" He cast the spell again, feeling the tremor run through the beaten body before him. "Shame. I used to love your voice."

He took the hand in his own, waiting until Snape's black gaze rested on the fingers. "You meant so much to me, Severus Snape. You still mean something to me; your suffering cheers me immensely."

Thoughtlessly—or perhaps thoughtfully?—he squeezed Snape's hand.

Snape forgot his promise—and while he screamed Voldemort held him close to his chest and cradled him, "This never had to happen, Severus. But you made it happen."

He continued to tighten his grip on Snape's hand as his wand moved and hovered above the other weapon of the Potion's master.

The first promise and the body had been broken.


	3. Chapter 3

_Breaking, Chapter Three:_

_A change in perspective here; hopefully it adds a little variety to the story. For some reason this has been really hard to write—maybe I am just better at Snape torture? Which there will be more of, I promise. Really short, I apologise for that too...but I didn't want to overdo the impact._

_Ah well, the next update will be better!_

_Thank you so much for the reaction to the last chapter, it means the world to me that people actually enjoy and react to what I write._

_This chapter is dedicated to Kati, without whom, I would be much a lesser person and I love her loads!_

****

_I will rescue you today._

He had broken that promise already. He had watched the moment pass, when he had broken it. He had sat back and watched the hands move around the clock, unable to do anything.

He wasn't sure when it had started—one moment, he had been found. Rushing around, coordinating searches, trying to find where his beloved Snape had gone.

And then.

The pain in his chest. It had come on all of a sudden, like a knife stabbing into his lungs. For a moment he could not breathe; for a minute he was dizzy; for a hour he was inactive.

He had had to sit down. That was why he was sat here. In his office. Staring at the clock. Staring at the hands going round, feeling every second drain through his fingers like sand, and doing nothing about it.

Absolutely nothing.

Clearly, his body and heart were no longer working toward the same goal.

His body was reminding him that he was, in no uncertain terms, old. Too old to be rushing around after a young man who had done the unthinkable.

Too old to be rushing around after a young man who was probably already dead. What could he do about it anyway? It was not as if Tom would simply hand Severus over, if Dumbledore found him. He would want revenge.

Too old to save the boy he loved like a son? That could not be so. He knew parents would give everything to find their children, so what was wrong with him? Was it that he did not love Severus enough?

It could not be that. Every part of his body told him that he loved Severus, more than anything else on the Earth.

So why wouldn't it support him now, when he needed it the most?

He wanted to make a new promise. That he would stop at nothing to save Severus.

But could he really make that promise? Or was it...just another one he would break?

For with every promise that he broke, a part of his body broke too.

_I will rescue you, Severus._

That was one promise he would keep.


	4. Chapter 4

Breaking, Part Four.

_This is a little different. I am really sorry if it isn't very good, but I think it has considerable impact. I hope, anyway. So. Kati, you remain my inspiration, and you told me to follow my gut instinct, so here we are. I really, really hope it lives up to expectations. Thank you for everyone's guidance, help and reviews...it means the world to me._

_Any text in italics is thoughts, normal text is telling the story. Enjoy!_

_***_

_He'll come for me soon enough._

_**What makes you think you are worth saving?**_

Who said that? He was so sure he was alone. He had been alone for hours now. Hours? Maybe minutes. Seconds, perhaps. He didn't know. He didn't know anything anymore. He was trembling. He had no control of his body.

Was he losing control of his mind too?

_He'll come for me soon._

The same thought, over and over and over. Echoing through his mind.

_He'll come for me soon._

_**Why should he? You offended him. You disappointed him.**_

_No. He loves me. He does._

Who was this voice? Funny, for it sounded just like himself.

_He'll come for me._

_**When?**_

_I don't know. _

_**Why?**_

_Because he loves me._

_**Why?**_

_He said he did._

_**Why? Why would anyone care for a worthless spy like you?**_

_I did my job. I did my duty. He found me._

Why were there so many questions? He opened his eyes, and was met with darkness. Crushing darkness. Endless darkness.

_He will come for me._

_**You sound so certain. How disappointed you will be.**_

_He is coming for me. Leave me alone!_

_**You really are pathetic, Severus Snape.**_

_He is coming for me._

_**Why did you ever abandon the Darkness?**_

_No. The Darkness is wrong. It is perverted. A miscarriage. It is nothing to me._

_**You felt most at home in his shadow.**_

_No. He is wrong. He is perverted. He kills people!_

_**You killed people.**_

_Women! He kills women!_

_**You killed women.**_

_Children. Please. Won't...they were only children!_

_**You killed children.**_

_I was doing as I was told..._

_**You liked what you did. **_

_No. No. Stop. Please._

_**A murderer.**_

_Stop it!_

_**A killer.**_

_Please!_

_**A liar.**_

_I never lied..._

_**A coward.**_

He jolted upright, springing from his kneeling position and running towards...he did not get far. The chain around his ankle tautened, tightened, and pulled him down, crashing onto the floor. He lay for a moment, unable to move.

The voices started again.

_I am no coward._

_**You are the most terrible kind of coward, Severus Snape. What was it Dumbledore said? You will not choose a side so you can flit between the two.**_

_I am loyal to him._

_**Of course.**_

_I am!_

_**You said that about the Dark Lord.**_

_He..._

_**You said you would stay by his side.**_

_I changed._

_**You said you would carry out his orders.**_

_I changed. I had to change. The Darkness is wrong!_

_**You said you loved him.**_

_Please. I did love him. He was my Lord. Of course I did!_

_**You love him still.**_

_No. I have turned from this path. Stop leading me down it!_

_**You wanted to be back at his side.**_

_Stop it._

_**You know Dumbledore does not care for you.**_

_He does. He will..._

_**Will he? Will he really come for you? **_

_I want to go home..._

_**Where is home for you?**_

_Stop. Stop._

_**Home is where the heart is, Severus. Where is your heart? With Dumbledore?**_

_What? Yes._

_**You have a heart of Darkness.**_

_Stop!_

_**So you belong with him. Give in. Give in to the Darkness. Let him take you.**_

_No. No. NO! I will not!_

_**He will take you back. **_

_I don't want that._

_**He will hold you close.**_

_I don't want that. I don't want him._

_**He will make you powerful.**_

_Power?_

_**Power that you had. Power that you no longer possess.**_

_No. I don't need power. I will bring him down._

_**He will love you.**_

_He does not love anyone._

_**How can you be sure?**_

_He is the Dark Lord! He uses people only for his own ends._

_**And what of the Light Lord? What of your precious Dumbledore? Does he love anyone?**_

_Yes._

_**How do you know? How do you know he is not just using you?**_

_I will not stand for this. I will not let you say this!_

_**Who am I? I am just another part of you.**_

_But you are not the stronger part! I will not let you corrupt me again._

_**You want to hear my voice. You listen to it when you are at your weakest.**_

_I...no. I...stop it._

_**But I am telling you what you want to hear.**_

_No!_

_**What you need to hear.**_

_He will come for me._

_**When?**_

_He will come for me soon!_

_**Why?**_

_Because he loves me._

_**He is using you.**_

_No! He is good, a heart of light, he needs to love, that is his strength._

_**You are no soldier of the light, Severus Snape. Look what the light has done to you.**_

_I did this._

_**Yes, you did.**_

_Not Dumbledore._

_**Dumbledore sent you here.**_

_No. I made the choice. I chose to defy him. I chose to come here. I knew the risks. Dumbledore is a good man! _

_**A good man?**_

_Please stop. Please. I hate you._

_**You hate yourself.**_

_Yes. I hate myself. But Dumbledore sees worth in me! He sees a reason for my existence._

_**He is blind.**_

_Why are you doing this to me?_

_**You are doing it to yourself.**_

He was so confused. He needed to stop the voices. The voice? His voice? How could it be his voice? His own personality. Split. Halves. Two sides to every story. His side. The other side.

Darkness and Lightness. Evil and Good. Dumbledore and the Dark Lord. Who did he care for more?

How many people were there in his head? How many people were talking to him? How many people...were...hurting him? Was it just himself.

_I can block you out._

_**You always block me out. You need to hear my words. You need to hear the truth.**_

_You deliver not the truth. You deliver only lies. I do not need you. He will come for me._

_**Will he?**_

_Yes!_

_**When!**_

_He will come for me soon._

_**Why?**_

_Stop it! Stop it! STOP IT! Leave me alone. Leave me be._

_**I can never leave you. I am the part of you. The stronger part of you.**_

_I will silence you!_

_**You cannot silence me. You cannot silence yourself. I will win.**_

_I will not let you._

_**I will beat you. You will bow before the Dark Lord once more.**_

_No. No._

_**You will submit to his rule.**_

_No. Stop it._

_**You will let him take you again. **_

_I will not! I will not! I will NOT! Please, Headmaster, please, I need you. Come for me. take me away from this._

_**He is not coming.**_

_HE WILL COME FOR ME!_

_**When?**_

_SOON!_

_**Why?**_

_NO! I...I cannot do this. Leave me alone! Please!_

_**Leave you in this darkness? To die?**_

_I will not die. I will not give him that pleasure._

_**No. You will give him the pleasure of your subjugation. You will give him the pleasure of your surrender. You will return to his shadow like the creature you are.**_

_We will return to his shadow?_

_**Yes. You deserve to be there. You do not deserve the Light. You do not deserve any compassion, or mercy.**_

_Dumbledore says I am more deserving than any other man. He will come for me._

_**When?**_

_Soon._

_**Why?**_

_Because he loves me._

_**Why?**_

_Because he cares for me._

_**Why?**_

_Because he promised me._

_**Why?**_

_I can't._

_**Why?**_

_Stop._

_**Why?**_

_Please. I beg. Stop._

_**Why?**_

_He will come for me._

_**When?**_

_Soon._

_**Why?**_

_Because...he will._

_**Why?**_

_He is not coming._

_**He will not come.**_

_He will not come._

_**He is not coming.**_

_Why?_

_**Because he does not love you.**_

_Why?_

_**Because you are nothing to him.**_

_Why?_

_**Because you are nothing to anyone. You are just the servant.**_

_Why?_

_**Because that is all you will ever be.**_

_I am just a servant._

_**Just a servant.**_

_He is not coming for me._

_**He is not coming for you.**_

_I will die here._

_**You will die here.**_

_Unless I give myself to him._

_**Unless you give yourself to him.**_

_I beg him for mercy._

_**You beg him for mercy.**_

_I ask for his forgiveness._

_**You ask for his forgiveness.**_

_Will he accept me back?_

_**Will he accept you back?**_

_When will he come for me?_

_**Soon.**_

_Why will he come for me?_

_**Because he loves you.**_

_The Dark Lord loves no one._

_**Because you belong with him.**_

_At his feet._

_**In his shadow.**_

_Like the creature I am._

_**Like the creature you are.**_

_I am...I am nothing. I am no one. I am just a creature. The creature that belongs in his shadow._

He hated himself. He hated the Dark Lord. He hated Dumbledore. He hated the voices, the torturous voices, driving him towards insanity. But he needed the strength.

Did he still have strength?

The strength to make one last plea?

Before his mind broke. Forever.

_Headmaster..._

_Headmaster, I need you._

_You have to come for me._

_Soon._

_When will you come for me?_

_Why will you come for me?_

_Just come. Please._

_Soon._

_Because you love me._

_Soon._

_Because you care for me._

_Please._

_Please._

_Please...._

_***_

OK, I need to know if this worked. Next update next Saturday. But I really want to know what people thought. Good idea? Bad idea? Rubbish execution? Please, please, please tell me! Snape needs you!!! Thank you for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

_This has been edited because I completely forgot my Author's Note! I love Breaking...and thank you so much for the response it has gotten from you readers! I am awed and speechless every time I check my reviews....it's so wonderful to know that you are enjoying it as much as I am enjoying writing it. Only two more chapters to go now, sad, sad. Thank you for reading._

_Special thank you to Kati for betaing this and checking it was not as repetitive as last time!_

_****_

_I said I would rescue him. _

_**What's the point?**_

Who said that? He was so sure he was alone. He wouldn't see anyone; not for hours. He moved in the bed, unable to sleep. How could he possibly sleep at a time like this? He was losing control of his emotions...

Was he losing control of his mind too?

_I will rescue him._

The same thought, over and over and over.

_I will rescue him._

_**Why bother? He abandoned you.**_

_No. I love him. It's my job to protect him. I put him in this situation._

_**He put himself there.**_

_Aren't you supposed to make me feel guilty?_

_**Why should you feel guilty? He means nothing to you.**_

_That's a lie. He means more to me than anything._

_**Now who's lying?**_

Dumbledore leapt up from under his blankets, sitting upright. He couldn't cope with this voice. He could not believe that it might be speaking the truth.

_Where is Voldemort holding him? _He had asked himself the same question over, and over again, hoping that in the end, the answer would come to him as if on a whim. So far, it had not happened.

_**Maybe he's gone back to Voldemort.**_

That made no sense either! Why would he?

_**He argued with you. You don't want his service.**_

_No. I argued with him. I sent him away. I was a fool._

_**He is the fool. Why waste your time searching for him? Why are you bothering at all?**_

He was not going to argue with himself. He did not need to encourage insanity. He was still in control of his thoughts, after all. His thoughts of Severus. Trapped. Alone. And in need of him.

_**You won't even consider the probable truth. Think of him kneeling at Voldemort's feet.**_

He wouldn't let that image in. Instead the more painful one of a beaten and bleeding and _broken _Snape cluttered his mind.

_**Think about it.**_

_No. He wouldn't. He is not foolish._

_**How do you know?**_

_He is...true to the cause. He is brave. He belongs to the Light. He will not go back to Voldemort. _He sounded so certain of this.

_**At least consider it.**_

Severus, bending his back before the Dark Lord. Not because of an order, or an instruction, or seeking information. Simply because it pleased him to serve Voldemort.

Why was that image so believable?

_**You see? Why waste your time.**_

_Because he wouldn't! He won't! He...can't._

_**Why?**_

_Because he's not stupid. Anyway. I will rescue him before that happens._

_**When?**_

_When I find where he is being kept._

_**Why? Why would anyone care for a worthless spy like him?**_

_He was doing his job. His duty. I will find him. I want to find him._

There were too many questions for him to cope with. He thought of the darkness; crushing darkness. Endless darkness.

_**Why would he abandon the Darkness?**_

_Because he knows it is wrong. He knows it is perverted. It is nothing to him._

_**Do you not think he felt at home with Voldemort?**_

_Perhaps, once. But not anymore._

_**He killed people. Men, women and children. How could you love a monster like that?**_

_He was doing what he was told!_

_**Maybe he liked what he did?**_

_No. No. Stop it. _

_**He's a murderer.**_

_No he is not. Stop it._

_**He's a killer.**_

_I do not need to hear this. He is a good, honourable..._

_**A liar.**_

_He has never lied._

_**A coward.**_

_Coward...I called him coward._

_**A murderer, a killer, a liar and a coward. How is that worth saving?**_

He slammed his hand down onto his desk, regretting it when the pain reverberated through his fingers. He paused for a moment, frozen, unable to move.

The voices started again.

_He is loyal to me. He must be...._

_**Of course he is.**_

_He is. Severus Snape is a good man._

_**Has he told you he is loyal?**_

_Yes. Several times. He is worth saving._

_**He told Voldemort he was loyal too. How do you know he is not still loyal to him?**_

_He changed._

_**He said he would always serve the Dark Lord. How do you know he is not still serving that man?**_

_He changed!_

_**He said he would carry out his orders; now and forever. How do you know he is not still carrying out those orders?**_

_He changed when he realised the Darkness was wrong._

_**He said he loved the Dark Lord.**_

_What? No. Maybe, once. But he changed._

_**What if he loves him still? What if he has returned to him?**_

_He wouldn't! He has turned from that path. Stop leading me down this train of thought. I do not need it. He will come back to me._

He sat down in his armchair, pulling a map from the table and trying to distract his wandering mind. What if Severus had gone back to Voldemort? Why was he wasting all his time and effort searching for him?

_**The Dark Lord will make him powerful. The power that he lost when he abandoned Voldemort and returned to you. The power that he so desperately craves.**_

_He doesn't need power. Together we can bring Voldemort down. _

_**Are you sure?**_

_Yes._

_**Why?**_

_Because I know him._

_**You didn't seem to know him when you argued. Maybe it was all part of his plan?**_

_He would not do that._

_**How do you know?**_

_Because I KNOW HIM. Now, I need to concentrate. _

He looked back at the map. Where could Severus be? Why couldn't he find him? Why would Voldemort even keep him prisoner? Why not just kill him and be done with it?

_**You want him dead?**_

_It is better than the alternative._

_**Which is?**_

_Well...him possibly turning back to Voldemort....No. Wait. That will not happen! Stop it. Stop changing my mind._

_**You suggested it.**_

_He could have turned back to Voldemort._

_**He could.**_

_But why would he do that?_

_**Because he hasn't changed.**_

_Why?_

_**Because he still loves the Dark Lord.**_

_Why?_

_**Because he belongs to him.**_

_I can't believe this...I won't believe this..._

_**Why are you...**_

_Why am I wasting my time?_

_**Indeed.**_

He couldn't sit still. The voice was driving him mad. But what if it was right? Why was he wasting his time with Severus, if he wasn't really in trouble? He could have gone back to Voldemort.

He hated himself for even thinking that. He hated Voldemort for taking Severus away. He hated Severus for being so foolish in the first place! He hated the voice in his head, tormenting him, driving him toward insanity. But he needed the strength to find Severus.

Did he still have strength?

Strength to make one final plea?

Before his mind broke, forever.

_Severus..._

He paused, thinking, for a second, he heard the whisper of a name in his mind. _Headmaster...._ But no, it could not be.

_Severus, hold on for me. _

_I will come for you. _

_Soon._

_Because I love you._

_But you have to hold on. _

_Please._

_Please._

_Please...._

_***_

_As I say, only two to go no! How exciting! The next two will be tear jerkers, I promise. When we reach the end of the Breaking...._


	6. Chapter 6

_An update. I hope you enjoy. Kati, you mean the world to me. As Snape means to my Dumbledore._

_***_

Albus Dumbledore turned when he heard the knock on the door. "Come in." He had not slept. His thoughts had kept him awake—and now he was more determined than ever to rescue Severus. He would stop at nothing to rescue the boy...save him from the Hell that he must be imprisoned in.

If he had returned to Voldemort...then that did not matter. He would just be trying to survive. If he was being tortured, then Dumbledore would hold him and heal his wounds and they would still be together.

He would not lose the one who meant the world to him.

Sometimes, he was convinced he could hear the sound of Snape in his head. Whispering to him. Begging him to come. All through the night, just a murmur. A sound he could not catch hold of, much as he tried.

All he could do was reply.

_I will come for you, Severus. _That promise he would keep, it would not get broken. He would tear worlds apart. They were so close now.

He suddenly remembered the knock at the door, and turned to face the frame.

Remus had appeared in the doorway. He seemed...sadder. Snape's disappearance had taken a toll on all of them, that, Dumbledore knew well. He hardly recognised himself when he looked in the mirror.

"Remus." He greeted pleasantly.

"Albus." Lupin murmured, stepping into the warm office. Dumbledore smiled at him, "Any news of Severus?"

Lupin stared at him with a gaze that was almost piteous.

Dumbledore felt something...he wasn't sure what...clench his heart. "What is it?"

Lupin handed him a newspaper wordlessly. His hand was shaking.

Dumbledore took it from his hand. He stared at it, the crinkled yellow paper rolled up, hiding the headline. "What is this?" He asked.

Lupin swallowed, "You need to read it."

Dumbledore knew it was bad. "Just tell me."

Remus shook his head, "I can't." His voice trembled, ever so slightly. "Please, Albus, just look at it."

Dumbledore unrolled the newspaper.

Black letters danced before his eyes, refusing to lie still on the page, so desperate was he not to understand what they were saying.

But the words did not escape him. He could not escape the facts, printed in the cruel colour in front of him.

"No." He whispered. His throat was suddenly dry, as if he had forgotten how to talk. He rasped his next words. "No, this cannot be true." He shook his head, "It's not true." He looked up at Lupin, "Please. Tell me it isn't true."

Lupin reached out and touched his arm, "They want you to come to the scene. They need you there."

***

He felt numb. Nothing meant anything to him anymore. He knew he was breathing. He knew his legs were moving. But it felt as though he was detached from everything. The shock seemed to have stilled his heart.

He stood by the gate, looking down into the ditch. A ditch. Why a ditch? Just...abandoned. A ditch, outside a run down mansion.

This could not be.

Not now. Not after everything he had done. They had done. This couldn't be happening.

He knelt down and reached out a shaking hand. The skin was cold.

He ran his finger down the pale, still face. His nail brushed against raven hair.

Finally the tears started to spill, and his heart broke.

***

_I wait anxiously for your comments..._


	7. Chapter 7

_Wow, what a wonderful response to the last chapter. I know, it was a bit of a evil one, wasn't it? Well, here is the penultimate chapter. I hope everyone likes it, as there is only a little bit left to go now. And just for you, stn5, this chapter is twice as long as last time!_

_Thank you so much for reviewing, your continued support makes me so happy!_

_Kati, much loves, as always. Hope this turns your lip pout upside down!_

****

The pain was tangible. Sometimes it seemed to be another person in the room. Never had he felt so rotten—despite what the years had thrown at him, despite the losses and the fights and the wars...this seemed to top it all.

He could barely breathe. He could barely think. It seemed as though everything was breaking down around him. He was nearly, ever so nearly, broken.

He also was not sure if it was dark around him or if he was just blind. But then again, he was past caring. Darkness was comforting to him, it kept the pain at bay. He could just close his eyes and pretend it was not happening.

A sound, to his right. Noise. A footstep.

He was going to look up, but thought better of it. Moving his head hurt him, sent him into dizziness, forced him to accept the fact that he was still alive.

He had never wanted to be dead this badly. An end would be nice. An end would be kind.

The end, when it came, would be the mercy that his captor had not learnt to give. Thus, the end, was still so very far away.

"Severus!" The voice was too loud. It reverberated inside his skull and made him moan—if he had had the strength, he would have turned it into a curse.

"Now, now, Severus...how is that any way to address your captor?" The voice was exuberant today. Lord Voldemort was pleased. Snape dreaded to know why. "What do you say?"

Snape glanced at the white figure drifting towards him, gathered his strength, and spat bitterly on the floor in front of Voldemort's feet. Some of the saliva splattered onto the Dark Lord's robe. He bent down near to Snape and dragged one finger underneath his lip. Red droplets lingered on his white finger. He carelessly rubbed the blood away against Snape's hairline, before kneeling next to his captive. "I have something to show you, Severus." He murmured.

For the first time, Snape realised that Voldemort was holding something in his hand. What could it be? Something else to hit him with?

"It's made me rather happy, Severus." Voldemort did sound very pleased. "Because look! You're front page news!" He unrolled what was a copy of the Daily Prophet.

Relief grabbed Snape's heart just for a second—so Voldemort wasn't here to hurt him...but then his eyes took in the headline.

HOGWARTS PROFESSOR FOUND DEAD

He stared at the mirror image of himself, lying in a ditch, the flashes of cameras lighting up the moving picture. Except his body was unmoving. He felt his breath catch in his chest. "How did you..."

Voldemort whispered softly into Snape's ear, "Do you remember that Polyjuice Potion you made for me? Just one batch? You said it was more potent? I finally found a use for it..." He viciously grabbed Snape's hair and yanked him upright, ignoring the cry of pain from his prisoner. "But I think it is the second page you will like more. See, it's someone you know."

The light in the cell brightened slightly, as Voldemort turned the page.

His eyes could only focus on the picture. A man he knew well. Too well. Collapsed by the body in a later picture, shoulders slumped, spine curved.

A position that Snape knew only too well. Curling up to keep the agony in.

He stared at the silver grey hair, the long beard, the robes that he knew would be some lurid shade of blue or green.

_Headmaster..._

Voldemort's voice had dropped to an almost murderous whisper. "You're dead, Severus Snape." He paused, "A conveniently placed body, an Order inquiry...and a carving of my blessed Mark in your chest. You were dead long before anyone arrived to save you." He stroked one finger against the picture of Dumbledore, "Long before he came to save you."

There was a terrible pain inside his rib cage. If he could reach into his chest and pull out his heart, then he would. He could not stand to see his mentor, his friend, his _father_, in so much pain. His eyes scoured the article, latching onto words such as "sob", "tears" and "heartbreak", before his gaze became too blurry to define the letters. "You can't do this..."

"Do you know what this means, Severus?" Voldemort muttered, ignoring the agonised murmur from his prisoner, "It means that no one thinks you are alive."

Snape shook his head, brow crumpling, unable to tear his eyes from Dumbledore, "No..."

"No one will look for you any more." Voldemort roughly threw Snape down onto the ground, carefully ensuring that he would fall face first, crushing his broken hands beneath him. "Where is your hope now, Severus? Because no one is coming for you."

Snape felt everything shatter around him. His hope that he would be rescued; his hope that he would be reunited with Dumbledore...crumbled into nothing. He raised himself back up to his knees, reaching out for the paper. "Tell him I'm still alive..." He asked, unable to tear his gaze from the picture.

Voldemort laughed cruelly, "I don't think so. You told me that you were sorry, Severus Snape. You have no idea of what the word sorry means. I will make you sorry."

He turned, robes flapping behind him, storming from the room, leaving Snape in darkness.

The younger wizard was left on his own, in the cold. He continued to look at the picture, "I'm not dead!" He shouted, feeling the tears stream his cheeks as he yelled the words over and over at the picture, "Please, Headmaster...don't give up one me..."

He bent forward and pressed a gentle kiss to the moving image in the paper, "Don't give up on me..."

Was he crying for Dumbledore or for himself? Was he crying for the fact he had broken his mentor or broken himself?

Because no matter how he looked at it, that was what he was.

His body, his mind and now his heart had been painfully, terribly, irreparably..._broken_...

***


	8. Chapter 8

_Breaking, Chapter Eight_

_The final part! My goodness! And I reached the 50 review mark! A personal thank you to all who reviewed this humble story—and all 2,000 of you who have read it over time. I am so proud of this fic, but it has only become better through your comments and encouragement. I never expected it to get such a brilliant reaction—and I hope many of you will read the final multi-chapter story Broken, which at the moment is proving VERY difficult to write!_

_All my love to a Miss Kati, a very special and talented individual._

_So, in this chapter....a deed for Dumbledore. A mission for Voldemort. And one breaking individual at their feet...all is not well, and thing are about to get much worse...._

_Written in memory of Severus Snape, who died on May 2__nd__ 1998. The bravest man who ever lived._

* * *

A muttered incantation. A soft hiss as the stone fused. Silence for one long terrible moment. Awed by the overwhelming situation, no voices could function. No one had expected it to end like this. No one had predicted such a fate for such an individual.

He stepped forward, resting a hand on the stone marble. Right now, he needed to be alone. They left in respect. The stone was cold. Like him. Stone cold...dead.

He reached into his subdued navy robes, withdrawing a single black lily from the folds. The enchanted petals seemed to shimmer slightly in the dim light. He placed it upon the tomb. He traced the words with a shaking finger.

_Severus Snape  
1960-1995_

He bent forward and gently kissed the marble. "Sleep well now, and finally, my brave child."

One lonely tear streaked his weary cheek.

Without a glance back, Albus Dumbledore left.

* * *

"Crucio!"

A cry of pain, dragged from tired vocal chords. He shifted on the ground, trying to raise himself back up so he was in a sitting position. It took more strength than he possessed, and he collapsed onto the stone floor in a heap.

A cruel laugh. "You do provide such entertainment, Severus." Voldemort reached down and pulled Snape up from the ground, throwing him against the wall so that his bones reverberated from the impact. "But entertainment is not enough, I am afraid. I am determined to be victorious over you." He knelt down and tenderly brushed the hair away from Snape's cheek, "Tell me how I can break you."

Black eyes settled on his—but there was no response in the depths. Voldemort's brow crinkled in rage, and he slapped Snape across the cheek. "I shall tell you then. Your precious dignity means so much to you. I suppose it is all you have left now, since I crushed your hope in the palm of my hand."

Snape let his eyes fall back to his hands, shattered in his lap. Voldemort meant nothing to him. This whole situation was simply the waiting room. The wait before Death finally claimed him.

Also, he knew his silence enraged Voldemort. The quicker he angered, the faster Death would come. It wouldn't be long now...

Voldemort strode away from Snape, taking his position a few feet away, wand raised. "I will make you scream for mercy, Severus Snape. And then, and only then, will the end come." He smiled, a mirthless, terrible smile, "You know me, Severus. There is a tactic to everything I do. There is a reason for every choice."

"Method in the madness?" Snape whispered, loud enough for Voldemort to hear him. He placed screaming emphasis on the madness, his meaning clear.

Voldemort's back straightened, "You think I am mad, Severus Snape?" He folded his arms, lowering his wand. "Your viewpoint intrigues me. Why am I mad?"

Snape had not been expecting a response. He had been waiting for the Cruciatus. Of course Voldemort was mad. To murder so many innocents, to believe in "purification", anyone would have to be mad. How else could his conscience survive?

"I want an answer." Voldemort's voice had sharpened considerably. Snape knew he was dancing with dreadful pain. "Insane." He murmured, "You are completely insane. That is why you will never, ever win." He shook his head violently, ignoring the ringing in his ears and the lights that exploded across his vision, "The Light will conquer the Dark. Always."

"The "Light" have no idea, Severus." Voldemort's tone was almost pitiful, "You must realise this. You know that I will not have told you everything. Since even the shadow of suspicion lingered over your pale face, I have not told you correct information. Things you have fed back to your precious Dumbledore have been lies and dead ends." He shook his head, "You know in your heart they cannot win. Even with Potter. Even with Dumbledore."

The Doubt grabbed Snape's heart and refused to let go. He continued to watch Voldemort, unwilling to let on his fear. But Voldemort was right—their chances were low. Dumbledore was getting old; Potter was not old enough. Victory would not come to them.

"But whatever they do now matters not to you, Severus. Dumbledore believes that you are dead. You are just another number to him now. One day I shall reveal to him that you lay here long after that article was announced. I hope the guilt will kill him. But you will be long gone."

"You said you would only kill me when I begged for mercy."

"Screamed, Severus. Screamed for mercy. And that time will come."

"I will not give you that satisfaction. I never have. I never will."

Voldemort raised one fine eyebrow, "I find your faith amusing, Severus. But as the Dark Lord, I know much more than just the simple Cruciatus." He waved his wand, "Crucio!"

Snape's body flinched uncontrollably. Releasing him almost immediately, Voldemort laughed, "Although it remains one of my favourites. I wonder if all my followers have immunity to its most potent effects, or just you, Severus." Voldemort paused, "But I know where to start. I wonder how long you can last, Severus, before I begin to see the cracks."

Snape continued to look down at his destroyed hands. The Cruciatus would not kill him. But he was exhausted, hungry and weak. It could do serious damage to his mind. He remembered the fates of the Longbottoms. His mental strength meant everything to him. Holding onto what he called most dear—his memories.

Voldemort took a step forward, "Or would you like me to refrain from this activity?"

Snape let his eyes flicker to Voldemort's for a brief moment. Voldemort saw burning defiance, wearying tiredness—and a little fear. Of course Snape was afraid of him. Here he was, crumpled in a small heap opposite him, unable to stand or sit straight. Whereas Voldemort was standing tall, holding in one hand his wand and in the other the fate of his defeated servant. What amused him was Snape's continued struggle against giving up completely.

But he had known that Snape would be like this. That was why the wizard was still alive. Severus Snape had such beautiful elegance. He relied so much on his pride and dignity that the only way to break him completely was to take it away from him. Lord Voldemort was going to be the person to destroy him. The moment would not evade him any longer—"Crucio."

Snape closed his eyes, knowing that the pain was going to come. He knew it so well that at first, it hardly affected him. The feeling of needles being pushed into every follicle of his skin, forcing his heart to beat faster and his muscles to spasm, no matter how hard he tried to control them.

He had worked so hard to become immune to the effects of this curse...but he knew the longer he struggled, the harder it would become. Voldemort was determined to make him scream—Snape was determined to make him wait. He would never give in.

The pain became more and more intense. He started to count. He needed to keep some aspect of control. Control had always been his ally—it had allowed him to survive this long.

If he had not been so good at control, he would have broken so many years ago.

_One._

One. He had always just been one. The moment it had seemed like he was going to find someone else to share his life with, she had run away from him. The moment he had found someone else to share his life with, he had been fooled and had run away from him. Everyone left him behind. The needles were being pushed in deeper, he had to keep counting.

_Two._

How he had always wished for a partner. Someone to rely on. But that dependency had brought him tears—he had become so close to Dumbledore that when the connection had been ripped apart, he had felt something. Pain that was nowhere near to what he was feeling now. Was it worse? Was it better? He wasn't sure. Then again, indecision came with torture. It weakened the will.

_Three._

It felt as though the needles were heating up, driving acid and lava through his veins. His heart was pounding faster than he thought it possible; he was gasping as he was unable to get oxygen into his lungs.

_Four._

And suddenly he was cold. Unbearably cold. He was shivering, unable to generate heat, hating the fact that the sweat on his forehead was running into his tightly squeezed eyes—and he was unable to wipe it away.

_Five._

He slumped to the ground, landing on one of his mangled hands. An explosion of pain which caused him to wince, tears springing to his eyes as he felt the bones crush against the stone floor. He tried to move off his hand, but his body suddenly felt heavy, like a dead weight.

_Six._

He wanted to get to ten. He needed to get to ten. He wasn't counting seconds—had it been ten minutes? His mind wasn't sure any more. He was losing the capacity to think. If he lost thinking, he wouldn't be able to control his mouth. And he would not scream.

Even if it killed him, he would not scream.

_Seven._

The pain was intense. He drove his teeth into his bottom lip, delighted when blood covered his tongue, as it gave him something else to focus on. The taste of the blood was metallic, stinging his throat—and then there were the needles again. They were more like knives now.

_Eight._

His body was floundering. He was holding on but only just. He was drowning, the surface was there, but the more he kicked, the deeper he fell.

_Hold on, Severus. Don't you dare give him what he wants._

_Nine._

Reverting to mental stimulation helped.

_Think about something. For your sake, just think about something. Anything._

_Ten._

His mind was sluggish, slow to react. It didn't want to do what he wanted. Yes, he was thinking, but he was thinking about bad things. Dumbledore crying. That was not what he wanted!

_Eleven. _

He couldn't bear it any longer. His body felt like it was falling apart. He couldn't feel his feet, he was shivering and burning, still and gasping. He was the centre of paradoxes, brought on by this cruel curse and his crueller master. He needed a relief.

_For Earth's sake, why won't you kill me? Please kill me! Why can't I die?_

He had lost count. What number was he on? No. He couldn't lost control. He needed control!

_Please kill me._

He couldn't remember, he didn't know what number came next, no, he needed to hang on...

_Won't you please kill me? I want to die!_

_I WANT TO DIE!_

Sudden relief. He thought, at first, he was making it up. The pain. Was there. But gone, too. It was less. A voice, above his head. He struggled to hear it.

"That was....impressive, Severus."

Voldemort had released him from the curse. How long had he been under? How long had he been kicking, drowning, dying? Had he screamed? No, he couldn't have done. He remembered every moment, and yet had forgotten everything too.

"I knew you were strong." Voldemort sounded strange. Almost awed. There was a soft hand wiping the sweat away from his tortured face, brushing the hair back behind his ears. He was not yet ready to open his eyes. This could be a dream.

"You do not give in to physical pain..." Voldemort was twirling a piece of his hair between his white fingers. Finally he summoned the strength to let his eyes glance at his captor. "Which means your power lies in your mind," Voldemort continued, letting the black lock fall limply back against Snape's cheek. "But you are severely weakened. There is no way you can protect your mind from me now. I will see everything. I will have access to everything. You have proved to me that you are not a normal prisoner, Severus..." He repeated his words from earlier, "But how long will you last when I take your mind too? I wonder how long you will last, before I begin to see the cracks."

He backed off, waving his wand.

There was an explosion of pain—not the Cruciatus, no, far too explosive for that. A stabbing feeling across his arm. He looked down and saw blood. It couldn't be...

"Your own spell, Severus. It will be your downfall." Voldemort folded his arms, "Now. While you bleed. Let me in to your mind."

Snape gathered what little...anything...that he had left. "I will not. You will have to force your way in."

In a matter of seconds, Voldemort had crossed to Snape, pulling him up from the ground by his hair, and pushing his wand hard into Snape's forehead. "You really have no idea, Severus. You do not want me to try to force my way in. Now. Your choice."

Snape wrenched himself away from Voldemort, knowing that the Dark wizard was probably holding several clumps of hair, but unwilling to care. "I am not under your control."

"Yes, you are." Voldemort muttered in response, "You are my captive. I can do terrible things to you, Severus Snape. You do not want that."

"I don't care!" Snape replied, "I don't understand why you won't just kill me. I am no use to you. You won't get inside my head, I won't let you."

There was a long silence. Then Voldemort laughed, "You have just made a mistake, Severus Snape. You just challenged me. I don't lose challenges. I don't want to kill you, Severus Snape." He paused, "Not because you mean anything to me, or I like you. I don't want to kill you because..." He leaned forward and whispered into Snape's ear, "Where would be the fun in that?" He stood up, "And I know you have helpful information inside that mind of yours. Information that I can use to win this war. So, what's it to be? Willingly? Or will I have to destroy you first?"

Still shaking after the onslaught of the Cruciatus, Snape was determined to make one final stand. He was determined to prove to those who hadn't believed in him that he had been worth fighting for.

He wanted to prove to Dumbledore that he had not been a lost cause. He would not give his information away. They would never know of his sacrifice—but at least they would be safe.

Why hadn't Voldemort hurt him yet? He was waiting for the curse to fall, but no, the Dark Wizard was simply contemplating him. He would not be cowed by the silence. He liked silence. Just waiting wasn't going to beat him.

_Won't he do it, already? I need this to end..._

Voldemort knew what he was doing, the bastard. He was waiting until the nagging fear made Snape reckless. He was waiting for the opportune moment—except Snape didn't know what the opportune moment was. When he blinked? When he looked away? When he was so afraid that he didn't know what was happening? He wasn't sure of anything any more, that much was certain.

He felt the saliva catch at the back of his throat. He swallowed.

That was the opportune moment. With another Sectumsempra, Voldemort was there, slicing a terrible gash down Snape's chest. As pain erupted, he cast the next spell, "Legilimens!"

Snape was struggling. He couldn't control his mind and his body. This was too much for him...trying to repel Voldemort was difficult, he was the most accomplished Legilimens of all time...whereas Snape was...well, what was he?

"_You will be fine, Severus. You're such a good Occlumens, even I do not know what you are thinking. You're the only one who can do this..."_

Dumbledore believed in him. It was a shame that he was not there now to protect and guide him.

"Severus, surrender to me, let me inside." The voice was soothing. But Snape still resisted, repelling the wizard from his mind. "I won't."

"You fool, Severus Snape!" Voldemort's rage intensified his next slash, drawing blood again and exposing muscle due to its depth. Snape stared down at his chest, feeling nauseous at the sight of the blood. The numbness was spreading. How much could a body take before it started to shut down? He felt tired, weary, exhausted beyond belief. Things were breaking down, nothing could take this much pressure.

"Legilimens..."

He wanted to give in. But he wouldn't. The pain started again, the Cruciatus this time, constant, never ending, continuous agony. It was less potent than Sectumsempra, but its presence all over his body made it so very terrible. A moan of pain forced itself from his lips as Voldemort attacked his body and his mind, trying to find the access he needed.

Snape slammed himself back against the wall, pushing all his muscles straight and tense, trying not to give in. He wouldn't let this happen, it couldn't happen...another cry, louder this time, and he knew Voldemort had heard it, as suddenly the Cruciatus was deepening its hold, it was angrier and it was more powerful. It was triumphant, for it knew the ending was near.

"Severus..."

The voice was inside his mind. He screamed out his pain and frustration as the barriers he had put up started to break. He could feel his limbs starting to wield, his shields cracking.

The pain was too much, the terror in his heart too great. His mental shields were buckling, he couldn't hold out for much longer!

And then they were broken.

Voldemort was suddenly there, in his most precious and treasured memories, moments with Lily, moments with the Headmaster. He was seeing things he wasn't meant to see, information, things about the Order...but he seemed uninterested. Instead he was looking at conversations between Dumbledore and Snape, moments that the younger wizard had kept close to his heart, as well as his mind.

"Sentimental fool." Voldemort whispered cruelly. Snape could feel darkness creeping in, and he realised what Voldemort wanted to do. "No..."

There were arms around him, pulling him up, supporting him. It wasn't in his mind, it was physical. Voldemort was holding him close, wand gently resting against Snape's temple.

"Don't do this..." Snape whispered, knowing what the Dark Magic would do inside his head. He could feel the moments slipping away, corrupted.

Voldemort ignored his words, and simply shushed him, cradling him like the injured child. "You need to sleep, Severus..."

Sleep would spell the end. But he felt tired. He tried to fight, but the Dark Lord's embrace was too tight. His faith and hope was draining away through his fingers.

"You and him were never meant to be, Severus. I'll make you hate him." Voldemort muttered, close to his ear.

"Please don't..." Snape was willing to beg, he couldn't lose this.

A finger stroked his cheek, "You're mine, Severus Snape. Say it."

A pause. He didn't really know who he was anymore. But the hold was comforting, comfortable, and he didn't want to leave it. "I don't want to leave..."

Voldemort nodded slowly, "I know..."

Another silence.

"Tell me what I want to hear."

"I don't want to do this..." Snape muttered, but he wasn't sure if he was talking now, or talking in the past.

"Say it."

"Please...please..." He was at the end. His mind fell straight into Voldemort's grasp.

"Say it, Severus."

He let his eyes drift slowly closed, a whisper of breath falling, "...Mercy..."

* * *

_So there we are then. The end of Breaking. This chapter was so hard to write. Thank you for reading, sorry it was long...and Broken will be posted soon, I just have to write a few more parts. Reviews mean the world to me, so if you have the time, I need to know what everyone thinks....thank you!!!!!_

_SeverusSnape19._


End file.
